Welcome to The Hodgepodge Podcast’s 4th Annual Oscar Live Blog! Doug and Dirty A will be listing winners and losers and giving their commentary on the ceremony. Who knows? You might read comments from a special guest! The festivities get started around 8PM EST, so be sure to come back to the site then and refresh often! Thanks for reading!
7:50 – We’re getting settled in and bemoaning the marathon red carpet show.
7:52 – Ryan Gosling talking to Robin Roberts. Where is his partner, Russell Crowe? Wait….Here’s an unpopular opinion: Nice Guys was better than La La Land. There, I said it.
8:01 – Okay, let’s get this out of the way right away: Here are our picks for the major categories, or at least the ones we can remember right now. Best Picture: Doug & Dirty A: La La Land (though, Doug wants Arrival and Dirty A wants Manchester By the Sea); Best Director: Doug & Dirty A: Damien Chazelle; Best Actor: Doug: Casey Affleck / Dirty A: Denzel Washington, but he’s pulling for Affleck; Best Actress: Doug & Dirty A: Emma Stone, though we both think Natalie Portman should win this; Best Supporting Actor: Doug & Dirty A: Mahershala Ali, though Dirty A is pulling for Jeff Bridges; Best Supporting Actress: Doug & Dirty A: Viola Davis; Best Animated Film: Doug & Dirty A: Kubo and the Two Strings;
8:02 – Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban talking with Robin Roberts. I actually wish I was watching her show on HBO instead. Check out Big Little Lies!
8:05 – Dirty A: If you put your ear to Charlize Theron’s chest, you can hear the ocean – because her dress looks like a seashell. (Womp)
8:07 – Director Damien Chazelle speaking with Michael Strahan (and his sweet purple velvet suit!). Unpopular opinion: Whiplash was better than La La Land. There, I said it.
8:11 – Denzel Washington looks so annoyed that he has to be at the Oscars.
8:13 – It’s the battle of the velvet coats! Rock vs. Strahan. Dirty A: CAN YOU SEE WHAT THE ROCK IS WEARING?!?!?!?
8:15 – Naomie Harris getting harassed on the red carpet. She was great in Moonlight, but Viola Davis is a mortal lock for Best Supporting Actress.
8:17 – Dirty A: Naomie Harris’ dress looks like she stole a prop from Rogue One.
8:22 – Dirty A: “Mel, I want to ask how comfortable you are standing next to me,” Michael Strahan. Doug: Is that woman his wife or his daughter?? Our buddy Luke: She looks like she’s his captive.
8:24 – Emma Stone’s date is standing there awkwardly thinking, “No, I’m NOT Spider-Man.”
8:30 – FINALLY. This shit is starting.
8:32 – Justin Timberlake kicking off the show with “Can’t Stop the Feeling.” Smart way to get one of these nominated song performances out of the way.
8:33 – WHERE IS ANNA KENDRICK????
8:36 – Jimmy Kimmel jokes around at Timberlake’s expense. Dirty A: Timberlake is like, #NotMyJimmy
8:38 – Jimmy Kimmel ragging on Matt Damon over The Great Wall. Hilarious
8:41 – Jimmy proves that the entire audience didn’t watch Moonlight with a hilarious joke.
8:42 – Dirty A: Yeah, I wish you’d hide – getting in his digs on Meryl Streep early.
8:45 – Best Supporting Actor montage. I think Mahershala Ali is pretty much a lock for this one.
8:46 – Alicia Vikander – be still my heart.
8:48 – A lot of people cheering for Dev Patel. Could there be an upset?
8:49 – MAHERSHALA ALI wins Best Supporting Actor! Well deserved. He’s been great in everything I’ve seen him in.
8:56 – Kate McKinnon and Jason Bateman presenting some awards, starting with Best Makeup & Hairstyling.
8:58 – SUICIDE SQUAD JUST WON A FUCKING OSCAR. HOLY SHIT.
9:00 – Kate and Jason are back to present Best Costuming
9:01 – FANTASTIC BEASTS AND WHERE TO FIND THEM wins for Achievement in Costuming. Well deserved.
9:08 – Kimmel calls the stars of Hidden Figures “Algebra’s Angels.” Ha ha ha.
9:11 – O.J. MADE IN AMERICA wins Best Documentary. No surprises, but Ava DuVernay’s 13th was very deserving.
9:14 – Kimmel making cracks about OJ and the audience isn’t really laughing. He calls them on it, because OJ is a monster.
9:15 – The Rock introducing “How Far I’ll Go” from Moana.
9:18 – Dirty A: GOD DAMN IT, JOSH! WATCH YOUR FLAG! – Reacting to the color guard behind Moana hitting her in the head (I can’t spell her real name, but she’s great!)
9:24 – The President of the Academy making a roundabout speech about how Trump sucks and art is great. She’s right, but this show is long enough.
9:27 – Captain America and the lady alien from Star Trek Beyond to present Best Sound Editing to ARRIVAL! Woo!
9:29 – Cap and Boutella back to present Sound Mixing.
9:30 – HACKSAW RIDGE wins for Best Sound Mixing.
9:36 – Vince Vaughn is on stage to talk about the Governor’s Awards and apologize for True Detective Season 2
9:39 – Best Supporting Actress montage. Viola Davis is a mortal lock.
9:44 – Dirty A: (Seeing Michelle Williams’ scene) I’m going to cry right now.
9:45 – VIOLA DAVIS wins Best Supporting Actress…as predicted by everyone. She was great in Fences.
9:56 – After Charlize Theron praises Shirley Maclaine in The Apartment, the two of them come out to present Best Foreign Film.
9:58 – THE SALESMAN from Iran wins Best Foreign Language Film!
10:01 – Dev Patel introduces Sting to perform his nominated song “The Empty Chair.”
10:06 – Dirty A: Why isn’t Cyndi Lauper in this Time After Time show ABC keeps promoting?
10:08 – PIPER wins Best Animated Short! It was adorable. Borrowed Time was really great, though. Tough to pick between the two of them.
10:11 – Best Animated Feature goes to ZOOTOPIA. It was a good movie, but nowhere near as great as Kubo and the Two Strings. Criminal.
10:13 – Dakota Johnson and Jamie Dornan – two people who despise each other – present Production Design
10:14 – And the LA LA LAND avalanche begins. Pretty film, but I felt some of the other nominees were more deserving.
10:16 – The first play off, because this guy is reading slow as fuck.
10:17 – Jimmy Kimmel launches his Tour Bus gag where they bring in a bunch of people on a tour bus. It’s not going over as well as he’d hoped, I think.
10:21 – Guillermo! Huzzah! But seriously, they need to play off this bit.
10:30 – Felicity Jones and Riz Ahmed, stars of last year’s Star Wars fan film, present the Visual Effects Oscar to THE JUNGLE BOOK. Makes sense since EVERYTHING in that film is a visual effect except for the kid.
10:34 – Seth Rogen and Michael J. Fox team up after Rogen gushed about Back to the Future. Dirty A: They finally did it, they got the stars of Teen Wolf and Teen Wolf 2 on the same Oscars!
10:36 – HACKSAW RIDGE wins for Best Film Editing!
10:44 – David Oyelowo tries his hardest to not stare at Salma Hayek’s boobs as they present the Oscar for Documentary Short Subject to THE WHITE HELMETS.
10:47 – David’s struggle continues as he and Salma present Live Action Short Film to SING – not the animated movie about the koala.
10:51 – John Cho and Leslie Mann talk about how they handed out awards for film science and technology two weeks ago. Dirty A: Leslie Mann took her curtains and turned them into a dress.
10:56 – Javier Bardem talks about how great Meryl Streep was in Bridges of Madison County. And they present the Oscar for Achievement in Cinematography.
10:59 – LA LA LAND wins. Linus Sandgren was the cinematographer.
11:04 – Kimmel’s Oscar Mean Tweets were pretty funny and then Gosling and Stone come out to introduce their nominated songs, sung by John Legend. Dirty A: OH, that’s what the song is supposed to sound like!
11:13 – Sam Jackson steps out in another velvet jacket. Dirty A: Who wore it better, The Rock or Sam Jackson?
11:14 – LA LA LAND wins Best Original Score. Justin Hurwitz was the composer.
11:16 – Scarlett Johansson presents the Oscar for Best Original Song to LA LA LAND’s “City of Stars.”
11:20 – And now, Dirty A and I will try to choke back the tears as In Memoriam begins.
11:24 – Goodbye, Carrie Fisher. You’ll always be our princess.
11:28 – Jimmy Kimmel takes his Matt Damon feud to the next level by destroying We Bought a Zoo. Hilarious!
11:29 – Ben Affleck and “Guest” step out to present the Oscar for Best Original Screenplay and Jimmy conducts the orchestra to play off Matt Damon. Brilliant.
11:31 – MANCHESTER BY THE SEA wins Best Original Screenplay! Congrats to Kenneth Lonergan! More than deserved! Fantastic film.
11:33 – Amy Adams, who was totally SNUBBED for her work in Arrival, presents Best Adapted Screenplay. Come on, Arrival!
11:34 – MOONLIGHT wins for Best Adapted Screenplay. Funny, considering no one in that theater got Kimmel’s joke about the film. In all seriousness, it was a very good film.
11:42 – Halle Berry comes out to present Best Director.
11:42 – DAMIEN CHAZELLE wins Best Director for LA LA LAND.
11:48 – Brie Larson (Captain Marvel!) is here to present Best Actor
11:51 – CASEY AFFLECK wins Best Actor! Denzel was amazing in Fences, but Affleck’s performance in Manchester by the Sea was masterful. Any other year, Denzel wins another Oscar.
11:54 – Here comes Leo to present Best Actress.
11:57 – EMMA STONE wins Best Actress, stealing it from Natalie Portman. Truth. I love Emma, but I’m floored that it didn’t go to Natalie.
12:00 – For Best Picture, I’m pretty sure Harrison Ford is going to crash his plane into the theater to present. Stick to the Millennium Falcon, please, Harry.
12:03 – Warren Beatty and Faye Dunaway arrive to present Best Picture…probably to La La Land.
12:09 – LA LA LAND is FINALLY announced as Best Picture after Beatty dragged out the announcement to get more screen time. Ass.
12:12 – HOLY SHIT. MOONLIGHT is the REAL winner. UNBELIEVABLE! Apologies to Warren Beatty after his explanation over what happened. Apparently, they gave him the wrong envelope. How does that happen? Anyway, Congrats to Moonlight!
12:15 – That’ll do it for our 4th Annual Oscar Live Blog. What a wild ending! Good job by Jimmy Kimmel and congrats to all the winners. Thanks to everyone who kept up with us this year and we’ll see you next year!