Welcome to film’s biggest party! At my house. In my jeans…. Anyway, Doug here with The Hodgepodge Podcast’s 10th Annual Oscars Live Blog! The show starts at 8PM EST, so come back then for the comedy bits and analysis of the actual awards ceremony. Dirty A will be chiming in throughout and we’re looking to have a good time! Follow along throughout the night!

(All times are EST)

7:41 – Here we go! Dirty A and I already have our first debate: Was Hugh Grant being a dick in his pre-show interview with model Ashley Graham? Dirty A says yes, I say Hugh was getting terrible questions.

7:42 – Dirty A questions the lack of the red carpet this evening. The producers went with champagne to be “more calming.” Whatevs.

7:44 – Michelle Yeoh getting interviewed by Vanessa Hudgens. She’s my pick for Best Actress.

7:46 – The MAN, Pedro Pascal! He’ll probably tell people to tune into The Last of Us finale halfway through.

7:49 – Both Dirty A and I pick Brendan Fraser to win Best Actor tonight. He won the SAG for Best Male Actor, so that’s a good sign. However, I think Austin Butler has a lot of support for his turn in Elvis. We’ll see what happens!

7:52 – Ashley Graham is a beautiful lady and an inspiration as a plus-size model, but she is not very good at this.

7:53 – Dirty A feels the only award Elvis should receive is the one Tom Hanks won last night – it was a Razzie.

7:55 – Dirty A declares Nicole Kidman spokesperson for the movies, along with Vin Diesel.

7:58 – Show’s about to start! Meanwhile, the Sixers are up 15 on the Wizards.

8:00 – “You’re gonna need a montage. Montage!”

8:02 – Now Jimmy Kimmel is in Top Gun with Tom Cruise. Probably would have made it better.

8:04 – Kimmel: So glad Nicole Kidman has been released from that abandoned AMC theater. Also, way to encourage the people already at the theater to go to the theater. Lol

8:06 – We have our first Pauley Shore joke of the evening – Ke Huy Quan and Brendan Fraser were in Encino Man together with Shore.

8:08 – John Williams, at 91, is the oldest Oscar nominee. Only Walt Disney has been nominated for more Oscars than Williams.

8:10 – Oh wow, Jim Cameron isn’t there. He didn’t get a Best Director nom, but the movie he is tied so tightly to is nominated. What a wank if that’s why he didn’t show.

8:11 – “Everyone loved Top Gun: Maverick.” Not me. Tom Cruise isn’t there either. Wow. Nicole Kidman can breathe easy now, I guess.

8:14 – Here come the slap jokes. Kimmel giving it to last year’s attendants who did…absolutely nothing.

8:16 – Dancers from RRR are going to dance people off stage if they take too long. Lol

8:17 – Emily Blunt and The Rock to present Best Animated Feature. Weren’t they in a movie together? Guillermo Del Toro’s Pinocchio will probably win (still have to see that), but I’m pulling for Turning Red.

8:19 – The Oscar goes to Guillermo! And not Jimmy Kimmel’s sidekick!

8:20 – “Animation is cinema. It is not a genre.” Well said, Guillermo.

8:21 – Sixers won, 112-93. I know this is the biggest update for everyone.

8:26 – Avatar: Way of Water film package. Zzzzzzzz

8:27 – We’re going to do Judd Hirsch’s category first, Kimmel says, because Hirsch is the oldest nominee at almost 88. Lol

8:28 – Dirty A: “no beginning, and no end”isn’t that just the avatar tagline?

8:29 – Best Supporting Actor. I think Ke Huy Quan takes this one.

8:30 – The Oscar goes to Ke Huy Quan!!! YAY!!!!! Well-deserved!

8:31 – Awwww, he’s crying. Love this guy. He has the best story. He thanked Jeff Cohen from Goonies! “His Goonie Brother for Life.” He says to keep our dreams alive. So, I’m going to stop this blog and go work on my novel.

8:34 – Now, Best Supporting Actress. I think this is Angela Bassett’s to lose.

8:37 – HOLY SHIT – Jamie Lee Curtis wins!!!! WOW.

8:38 – Dirty A: Is this a Guest Mockumentary? Lol. Chris Guest is married to Jamie Lee Curtis. This was her first nomination ever and a HUGE upset. Good for her!

8:47 – TAR film package. This one had its moments and Cate Blanchett was great, but the film never grabbed me. The first 30 minutes or so are real slog.

8:49 – Riz Ahmed and Questlove are here to present Best Documentary. Questlove won this last year, but you won’t remember that, because Will Smith committed an assault right before he accepted the award.

8:51 – The Oscar goes to Navalny! Alexei Navalny is still in solitary confinement for opposing that piece of shit Putin.

8:54 – Now for Best Live Action Short Film.

8:55 – The Oscar goes to An Irish Goodbye!

8:56 – The filmmakers use the rest of their time to sing Happy Birthday to James Martin, one of the stars of their film, who wore a snazzy leopard print jacket! Happy Birthday, James!

8:58 – What the fuck is this? A commercial for The Little Mermaid in the middle of the Oscars? Isn’t this show long enough? Fuck your synergy, Disney!

8:59 – And Halle Bailey will make a fantastic Ariel, but COME ON.

9:02 – All Quiet on the Western Front film package. Still have to see this too. DAMN ALL YOUR CONTENT, NETFLIX!!!

9:03 – Michael B. Jordan and Jonathan Majors to present Best Cinematography! KANG!!!!!!!

9:05 – The Oscar goes to All Quiet on the Western Front! James Friend is the cinematographer. Congrats!

9:06 – Dirty A points out that Majors is dressed like Victor Timely. Majors said in the preshow that his suit is an homage to Frederick Douglass. That first bit is an Ant-Man spoiler.

9:07 – Donnie Yen presents “This Is The Life,” performed by David Byrne, Stephanie Hsu, and others.

9:09 – AND DAVID BYRNE HAS THE HOT DOG FINGERS!!!!!

9:11 – Dirty A: “i do love the talking heads, but it sounded like david byrne was eating some of his hot dog fingers while trying to sing”

9:15 – Film package for Women Talking.

9:16 – Sam Jackson and Suit Lady (Jennifer Connelly) to present Best Makeup and Hair.

9: 18 – The Oscar goes to The Whale! Honestly, I was pulling for The Batman, solely for the work they did to make Collin Farrell unrecognizable. But, this is well-deserved.

9:20 – Morgan Freeman (looking more like Lou Gossett Jr.) and Margot Robbie to present some tribute to Warner Bros.

9:23 – Loving these commercials in the show itself. I need to watch The Last of Us tonight, speed this up!

9:24 – The Banshees of Inisherin film package. Really good film.

9:25 – And Jimmy Kimmel brings out the little donkey! Awwwww!

9:26 – Paul Dano and Julia Louis-Dreyfus to present Best Costume Design. They’re hilarious.

9:28 – And the Oscar goes to Black Panther: Wakanda Forever! Designer: Ruth Carter

9:31 – “Naatu Naatu” performance from RRR – the first Oscar nomination from an Indian production.

9:38 – Eva Longoria and Janet Yang (President of the Academy) to yak about the Academy’s Museum. Dirty A: they have an interactive experience where you can be slapped by will smith

9:41 – Salma Hayek and Antonio Banderas here to present the Oscar for Best International Film.

9:43 – All Quiet on the Western Front wins the Oscar!

9:48 – Fabelmans film package. I really liked this one.

9:50 – Elizabeth Olsen and Pedro Pascal present the Oscars for Best Short Documentary and Best Animated Short.

9:51 – Best Short Documentary goes to The Elephant Whisperers! Oscars showing the Indian community a lot of love tonight!

9:54 – Best Animated Short goes to The Boy, The Mole, The Fox and the Horse, based on a book! Congrats!

9:57 – Lady Gaga to sing her “deeply personal song.” She wrote it for Top Gun 2. So…sure.

10:00 – Gaga keeps singing “Hold my hand.” He can’t! He’s flying in a jet! Thank you, I’m here all night.

10:07 – Hugh Grant and Andie McDowell reunite to present the Oscar for Achievement in Production Design.

10:07 – They also showed the film package for Triangle of Sadness, but the less said about that, the better.

10:08 – All Quiet on the Western Front wins another one!

10:10 – John Cho and Mindy Kaling to present Best Original Score.

10:12 – The Oscar goes to All Quiet on the Western Front! They are cleaning up! Volker Bertelmann is the composer.

10:21 – Elvis film package. I’m not a Baz Luhrmann fan, so I didn’t see it.

10:22 – Elizabeth Banks and Cocaine Bear to present Best Visual Effects! Her voice is going. Lol

10:24 – Avatar: The Way of Water predictably wins this one. The whole movie is basically animated.

10:25 – It’s about time they cut off a white person.

10:26 – Malala is there! Wow! Jimmy Kimmel doing a bit while they set the stage for Rhianna.

10:28 – Kimmel gets a dig in on Matt Damon with the help of Jessica Chastain, who appears to be the ONLY person wearing a mask tonight. Stay strong, sister!

10:29 – Danai Guira presents Rhianna and her song she did for Wakanda Forever.

10:32 – Dirty A: i don’t like that it looks like rhianna is in a bird’s nest

10:36 – Everything Everywhere All at Once film package. This film has held viewers’ imaginations the whole year and has won every major award leading up to the Oscars. It’s my pick for Best Picture.

10:38 – Florence Pugh and Andrew Garfield to present the two screenplay Oscars – Best Original and Best Adapted.

10:40 – And the Oscar for Best Original Screenplay goes to Everything Everywhere All at Once! Daniel Kwan and Daniel Scheinert for the win! Most original film of the year.

10:43 – And the Oscar goes to Women Talking for Best Adapted Screenplay! Sarah Polley, the film’s director, wins the prize! Congrats! Still need to see this one.

10:49 – Film package for Top Gun: Maverick, a film that I cannot believe was nominated for Best Picture.

10:50 – Dirty A: 1986 is laughing at this nomination

10:51 – From Glass Onion, Janelle Monae and Kate Hudson present the Oscars for Sound.

10:53 – The Sound Team from Top Gun: Maverick win the Oscar – probably the only Oscar this movie should have been nominated for.

10:56 – Best Original Song mercifully goes to Naatu Naatu from RRR. The rest were just not that good. Sorry, Top Gun should be awarded for Highway to the Danger Zone, not some Gaga ballad.

10:58 – John Travolta! How did the Church of Scientology let him out and not Tom Cruise?

10:59 – Lenny Kravitz singing over the In Memoriam portion of the show.

11:01 – Let the battle begin over who was left off the list!

11:06 – Zoe Saldana and Sigourney Weaver to present Best Editing.

11:07 – The Oscar goes to Everything Everywhere All at Once! Hooray! Totally deserved considering how fast-paced that film was.

11:10 – Idris Elba and Nicole Kidman to present Best Director!

11:11 – And the Oscar goes to THE DANIELS! Everything Everywhere All at Once! Well-deserved!

11:16 – I wonder if Harrison Ford is presenting Best Actress since last year’s Best Actor winner is banned from the premises?

11:19 – Jessica Chastain and Halle BERRY present the Lead Acting awards.

11:22 – And the Oscar goes to BRENDAN FRASER! Hooray! He did a great job in The Whale.

11:24 – Fraser is a great comeback story. Good for him.

11:27 – Now for Best Actress. Come on Michelle Yeoh!

11:27 – MICHELLE YEOH WINS!!!!!!

11:28 – That’s three acting wins for Everything Everywhere All at Once!

11:31 – Ke Huy Quan gives Harrison Ford a standing ovation as he comes out to present Best Picture.

11:32 – The Oscar goes to EVERYTHING EVERYWHERE ALL AT ONCE!

11:33: Ke Huy Quan gives Harrison Ford the biggest hug after charging the stage. Indy and Short Round together again!

11:34: Film Legend James Hong is wearing googly eyes on his bow tie!

So, that’ll do it for this year. A little predictable, but no less great in its outcome. Thanks for following along and reading! Hope you enjoyed it! See you next year!